Poem things, Unfinished songs

D.T.B.D


I don’t ever wanna let you down,
Never wanna see that frown,
Never wanna here those sounds,
That you make,
When you’re feeling a bit too crazy,
Maybe,
There are parts to our story,
That need,
A little readdressing,
That’s all,
I’m sure,
We can make this thing last all night,
Make all the little wrongs,
Feel so right,
And we can never get washed up,
Or beat down,
Never let this old,
Sad town,
Feel like our only homely,
Place to,
Eventually break out,
And be found,
No way,
Not now.

And I don’t ever wanna let you down,
Never wanna see that frown,
Never wanna here those sounds,
That you make to,
When you’re feeling a little angry,
I see,
That we can get a little caught up,
In steam,
Feeling like we can’t be heard,
Or seen,
It’s a little bit like a bad dream,
I mean,
That I don’t want it to be,
The only parts of our memories,
That bleed,
Into our consciousness,
When we,
Begin to seem as if we aren’t there,
Or free,
From our disconnections,
And envy,
Now please,
Here me,

Because.

I don’t ever wanna let you down,
Never wanna see that frown,
Never wanna here those sounds,
That you make to me.
When you feel a little bit too crazy,
Or we get a little bit too angry,
It’s all just a little day time,
Bad dream.
Just a little day time bad dream.


NV. Written on July 20th, 2018 started @ 5:37 p.m. finished @ 6:12 p.m.

Wish I could put music behind this, but I lack the talent and resources required to do it on my own and connections for collaboration, for now it sits as this, like many incomplete ideas and creations. Thank you for reading or singing in your head, it’s a work in progress, for the future I hope. -SF.

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Poem things, Rants and Thoughts, Unfinished songs

Contemplating Comfort

Seeing comfort and carelessness,
Caress anxiety and impression-less,
Situations that fill the rest,
Of an empty mess,
In a burial ground,
For thoughts in test,
Or times to bless,
So that we forget less.

But what’s to blame,
Is the my last name,
The games we played,
The towns we tamed,
The nights we raid,
The sounds un-sang,
One way or another,
We both get payed,
Or laid,
By the grief and satisfaction,
In the moments of our reactions.

When we blast back,
To see our backpack,
Of problems and potential,
To see how essential,
It is to manage your mind,
Appreciate your time,
And sustain the relatable,
Undebatable creational,
Representation,
Of your self and more.

It is easy to loose yourself,
In the lonliness of openness,
Or the helplessness,
Of pretentiousness,
For its a bottomless chest,
Filled with the unimpressed,
Zest-less messed with,
Undefined guessing,
Designed for undressing,
Molten memories,
Masked for mistaking.

Its all a changing,
Sightless and hopelessly,
Forgetful happening,
That is beginning to exsist with me,
Even though we’re divided clean,
My thoughts are still tormenting,
As I’m told to be expressingly,
Open to anything,
As if reality has found a seam,
To the dimensions of my dreams.

Now caught in a scene,
An acted misery,
Or a faithful blistering,
Battle with what i mean,
As i write these dreadful pleas,
To contract a little glee,
Now I’m free,
As i enter the limiting,
End to simple deeds,
This is me,
Expressing whole heartedly,
Investing all my needs,
In art and poetry.


NV. – written on July 8th-9th, 2018 started @ 9:47 p.m. on the 8th, re-visited and finished on the 9th from 3:57-4:46 p.m.

Poem things, Rants and Thoughts, Unfinished songs

The Songbird Sings


As the songbird sings,
Her notes so high,
It feels like I could fly,
While the seconds pass by.

As the songbird sings,
Her tune will last,
With a visual cast,
Diminishing moments past.

As the songbird sings,
Her melodies are found,
Through the sweet subtle sound,
Of the songbirds bounds.

As the songbird sings,
Her songs express so free,
That relaxation caresses me,
As the songbirds sings,
So happily from her tree.


NV. – written on July 9th, 2018 started @ 1:47 p.m. finished @ 2:32 p.m.

A bird singing its song was a bit overwhelming, so I distracted myself with a bit of poetry, hope you enjoy. feel free to leave a like, comment or even follow the blog if you happen to wnjoy this. be sure to scroll down and check out some other words I’ve put together. Thanks 🙂 -SF.

Poem things, Rants and Thoughts, Unfinished songs

Convoluted Contemplation


Feeling like a freak,

A fiend,

A founder of foolish fantasies,

The type that typically tremble,

Under my own tormented testimony,

Testifying against my own will,

My own goals,

My own home,

My whole role,

It’s all a cold,

Convoluted,

Concentrated,

Congregated,

Compilation of complications,

Yet it’s not contemplated,

It’s the way I was made,

And that can be hurtful or hated,

But never doubtfully debated,

I can take it.

Turn me around,

Roast my town,

Flip the frowns,

Now make ‘em proud,

To be heard loud,

With this sad sound,

I can feel it right now,

But that’s not what this is about.

It’s about problematic insight,

Memories kept sealed tight,

Ideas that don’t feel quite right,

The type of nights,

Filled with fear and flights,

Inside the mind,

I hate those types,

But what would life be without the fight?

Can only dream to have it easy,

Even though I’m supported,

A better life is always teasing,

For those who can afford it,

But I don’t own shit,

Have a place with no floor,

And a ceiling that leaks,

Going hungry for weeks,

To try and repeat my grief,

Now I’m falling back asleep,

Just to relive my dreams,

It would seem,

I’m bit far off from my meaning,

Yet these words keep on seeking,

A little bit more sound releasing,

From the parts of me that are speaking,

It’s not about just believing,

In a better part of you,

The part meant for keeping,

It’s about finding the reason,

Repeating the problems,

Until hope stops the bleeding,

You can be free,

From all that’s inhibiting,

Your growth and your dreams,

Just follow their lead.


NV. – written on June 27th, 2018 started @ 9:02 a.m. finished @ 9:29 a.m.

No context, feel like this one speaks for itself. – SF.

Poem things, Rants and Thoughts, Unfinished songs

Controlled


We the people will learn,

Find new ways to earn.

Live by our own standards,

Not be controlled by you bastards.

A distraction for this,

Here, read down the list.

A distraction for that,

Like is fucking roulette.

So many forms of subliminal messaging,

Soon enough there will be a reckoning.

If they built an illusion of choice,

Then we are here to make some noise.

Massacres in mind blowing numbers,

You’d think we’d be encumbered.

To many problems with our history,

That they just erase thing off the lists you read.

Let’s manipulate the many rates,

Suppress us until we complicate,

The better parts of the system,

The one we all live in.

We can change the future,

But when you try they shoot ya.

One country,

Any love, see?

Wanna run?

Your inability has only just begun.

More ways to stack debts,

That ways to cash checks.

That’s a mess,

Controlling us likes it’s fucking chess.

I won’t have it,

Can no longer stand it.

I demand to see change,

In this place I was made.

Didn’t choose to be here,

But I see that it fears,

A little mental expression,

Now come and try your repression.


NV. – started sometime in May of 2018, finished @ 11:01 p.m. on June 20th, 2018.

This is America.

Poem things, Rants and Thoughts, Unfinished songs

Chimes


Searching,

For the right words,

The right verbs,

And herds of ambition,

Without bringing on superstition.

In my vision,

I still have no beginning,

Haven’t felt like I was winning,

Since the days I was still in,

High school.

For that shit I was too cool,

Guess that’s why I’m not now,

Just another name to be forgot,

Let that happen to me?

I will not.

Can you imagine that though?

No place to call home,

No one blowing up your phone,

No expression to moan,

To somebody,

Just a nobody,

Well,

A taken for granted body,

Embodied by a soul,

With a sense of direction,

That’s has yet to take hold,

I was told,

“You’ll regret those decisions when you’re old.”

That’s gold.

Now I’m beaten,

Battered,

But bold.

Although not yet sold,

On any one path,

I will blast through the aftermath,

As I lay to rest the rest of my breath,

It seems I’m a bit short in fact,

It won’t last,

This panic attack,

It’s not back,

Just relax,

Take a deep,

Dive into another ride through the spirals of your mind,

Wanna get known?

Find the rhymes,

Find the chimes,

Find the…time.

No one has enough,

When we loose one another,

A sister or a brother,

Father or a mother,

All we seem to be able to do is just wonder,

Was I there enough?

Speak to them enough?

Show them that we care?

Enough.

No sad sulking tears,

No,

Not for the loved ones,

But our fears,

As we drown the mounds of our frowns,

And lay to rest the people we miss now,

We may start to hear sounds,

Its them speaking,

Telling us to stop drinking,

Do more thinking,

“You’ll find that beginning.”

I can still hear,

The ones we love and miss so dear,

They feel so near,

Maybe I’m in the wrong gear,

Need to shift,

Perspectives,

I’m invested,

I’ve Ingested,

Many maddening motivations,

Molded by monopolized,

People,

Ones talked about too much.

Maybe I’m too stuck,

On the girl I want to fuck,

And the thoughts I try to duck.

But I’m in luck,

With such a wonderful view,

I’m up to nothing that’s new,

But now this poem is quite…

Through.


NV. – written on June 20th, 2018 started @ 9:57 p.m. finished @ 10:30 p.m.

Just found myself in unable to obtain something truly wanted. Dealing with the fatigue of wonder and regret, not for anything major, but some small decisions that led to an inability to obtain said thing, with is more of an experience than a thing, but that’s irrelevant at this point. Just, take it from me, try to set goals you can obtain, don’t lead yourself into temptations that are inaccessible obligations. It can lead to this thing we call disappointment, I like to think of it as, failure to achieve expectations. But this is where I shall contradict myself, I try to not dwell or let my mind contract any, misleading, sad, obstructing or unsatisfactory feelings, thoughts or emotions. This is almost impossible for anyone of course, but in this case, I’m a bit caught up in mental states I’d rather feel the comfort in being able to overcome, but I can’t. I’m bummed, disappointed and have found a lack of achievement towards an expected experience…this poem is the result of me trying to put that…mindset into words. I suppose besides explaining here, but I don’t think I was aware of all of this until after the poem, funny how expression brings us closer to our problems and solutions…have a nice day. – S.F.

Poem things, Unfinished songs

Rough “Psycho” cover “Ghost Mode”


I hate this thing called ‘Ghost mode’,
I hate that I just dont know,
How the hell you’re doin’,
And how the hell your feelin’,
Wanna be with you while we’re sleepin’,
Are you even dreamin’,

Are you ok,
Are you fine,
How long do you need this time,
Something about this round just dont feel right,
Wish I could sit with you through the night,
But now I’m loosin all my might,
Wanna turn this whole thing around,
Wanna here you make all those sounds,
But now I’m loosin all my might,
Loosin all my might.

I hate this thing called ‘Ghost mode’,
I hate that I just don’t know,
How the hell you’re doin’,
And how the hell you’re feelin’,
Wanna be with you while we’re sleepin’,
Are you even dreamin’,

I saw you almost everyday for so long,
Now it’s just me and these songs,
Take another toke out of my bong,
Try and live for the moment,
But it feels like im living wrong
I can try and live for the moment,
But without you by my side,
I just wanna hit the rode and ride,
Take all my time,
Find my life,
Make some rhymes,
Maybe bring you back to mine,
Bring you back to mine,

I hate this thing called ‘Ghost mode’,
I hate that I just don’t know,
How the hell you’re doin’,
And how the hell you’re feelin’,
Wanna be with you while we’re sleepin’,
Are you even dreamin’,

I hate this thing called ‘Ghost mode’,
I hate that I just don’t know,
How the hell you’re doin’,
And how the hell you’re feelin’,
Wanna be with you while we’re sleepin’,
Are you even dreamin’,
Wanna just know how you’re feelin’,
How you’re feelin’.


NV. – written on May 8th, 2018 started @ 10:02 a.m. finished @ 10:27 a.m.

Was just listening to some Post Malone this morning and some words hit me. Typed them down and put them here…that is all. Its a rough draft, but I’ll work on this one later like some other ones, for now I will follow my train of thought and enter a new experience for the day. Thank you for viewing the randomness on here, have a nice day who ever you are. – SF.

Poem things, Rants and Thoughts, Unfinished songs

Mending


Broke my body,
so I mend my head,
exersise the things inside my mind that make me glad,
Reveal unknown truths about you and I,
Turn around the feelings we feel right now,
Feel alive for the moment and sit back down,
Calm your thoughts and complications,
Disassociate the distractions,
While reacting to the actions,
Of a master of being plastered,
Im a dissaster,
or maybe just too revealing of what I think,
Let that sink in,
That insecurity of wheather I should say this or if someone else has said it better,
Forget it, let it go for the moment that you’re owning,
Loose control when the world has you whirling,
Winding around a wheel of emotional impressions,
And the interpretations of the people present with the sessions,
Discussing what is known and what is not for the sake of instructions,
To instruct another with the wonder we’re all blessed with,
Connect with your connections and create a new consciousness,
Never limit one another by the definitions that we’re dressed in,
Now meditate for the sake of seeking grace or some greetings,
From the deepest parts of you and the way you think the world is,
Find answers to things you didnt know you were asking,
And reacting with passion and positivity while you just keep on basking,
Flow with the rhythm that keeps the memories drifting,
Allow for new thoughts and new things to start shifting
Somber seductions of your own mind will guide you through the process,
Releaving all of your problems,
Leaving you entraced in the nonsense.
make some sense of the things that we may sense,
To interpret our reality and change it without formality
Forming functions better than bad habits and duality,
But through this discussion we can assume reprecution,
I’ll amend with the systems when I want to try and function.
Fun things are found more frequent now than ever before,
Lifes doors have opened for new people and places,
This is true for any being that seeks that same truth,
Trust when I say this can happen for you.


NV. – written on May 7th, 2018 started @ 12:06 a.m. finished @ 12:46 a.m.

Poem things, Rants and Thoughts, Unfinished songs

Shaved


Shaving faces,
Tied my laces,
To change places,
Or change paces,
Have no car,
For the races.

Hit a tree,
With my truck,
Have our lives,
Thanks to luck,
I dont get it,
What the fuck?

Why the chances,
Why the stances,
Dont even know the dances,
Keeping track of the stats and,
Forgetting what has happened,
Can you even call this rappin?

Probably not,
But thanks alot,
Ill stay on top of,
the bad habits that I really need to stop,
Find a better way to be,
So I dont totally flop this.

I apologize for the times I failed,
Flailed my arms and whaled,
as I turned around and tucked my tail,
Theres no excuse for winding up in jail,
After 7 hours drinking then driving veiled,
It would only be my fault if we had been killed.

Now I can only move towards,
Simpler ways to move forward,
Using more than just four words,
To get my thoughts out and soar or,
Do more than just squander
The only life I can ponder.

Im trying to get back on track,
Before my life gets out of wack,
Gotta learn to attack,
All the issues at hand,
Not the bottle I cant handle,
But this life that we’re all in.

Get serious and just fall in,
Find the sin within to get rid,
Do whats right and just fit with,
Any person or place,
That come across as you chace,
To be one with the world and live in its space.


NV. – writen on April 24th, 2018 started @ 1:45 p.m. finished @ 2:58 p.m.

Shaved my…roughly 2 inch long mustache off today in light on needing some change in my life, I shall grow it back out this fall or late summer for any wondering. There was a picture of me up at an earlier point, but a face isnt necessary for a blog, with all that said…this is the result. Thank you for reading and any other forms of interaction had here, hope you enjoy and be sure to check out the others as well, share a thought if you aren’t afraid. Toodles. – SF.